Today, Shéra left a message on voice mail that just about broke my Heart when I heard it. Just the sound of her voice, how sad she sounded, brought out how I used to feel. I just wanted to give her a big hug and hold her. I still want her to be happy; it’s just that for the last year I’ve preferred that it be without me.
I mean, before it seemed I’d make her cry by trying to remain friends, and now she’s sad because we don’t talk. What the hell am I suppose to do?
It’s obvious I can’t make her happy, at least not without making myself miserable.
Mom heard the message too and I think it made her feel the same way because she said in that sympathetic tone of hers, “Shane, she really wants to talk to you.”
-sigh-
Maybe I’ll write her a quick e-mail before I leave.
